What Not To Say When Your Friends Are Hurting

This is a very good article that I came across this morning. When friends are going through a painful situation, we are all guilty of saying thoughtless things or typical clichés. Often these things just lead the one hurting to think, “You have no idea what you’re talking about.” For me, I think it depends on who is saying these things. For the ones that are walking through the pain with me, I sometimes find these words comforting, because I know the heart behind the words. For those that are not “in the trenches” with me, I find myself thinking, “You don’t have a clue.” But….I have learned that in times of grief and pain and difficult circumstances, it’s hard for both sides..the one hurting and the one trying to comfort. We don’t know the right words. And really….I don’t think it’s all about the words anyway. I think it’s about what’s behind the words; the sincerity or lack thereof.

But in the end, I think that it is better to say SOMETHING than not saying anything at all because you fear you’ll say the “wrong thing.” To not acknowledge someone’s pain is far more hurtful than saying the wrong the thing. And if you don’t have any profound words, a simple “I’ve been thinking about you”, can mean the world to someone that’s hurting.


Trusting His Plan,


2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Ashley Gaddy
    Oct 24, 2014 @ 09:17:12

    Praying for you! I love you!!



  2. Claudia Voigt
    Oct 24, 2014 @ 09:30:30




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