Two Years

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How can two years feel like two days and at the same time feel like twenty years???  Yesterday was the two year anniversary of Greg’s death.  Some days the pain and emotions are so raw that it feels like it all happened yesterday.  But at the same time, it seems like I’ve been without him forever.   I don’t know why, but this year was harder for me than this date last year.   My heart still aches for him…every day I find a new thing to miss about him.  My heart is still broken as I watch my children continue on without their Dad.  My heart still yearns for the things that will never be.  My heart is still sad that my life as Greg’s wife ended way before I had planned for it to end.  I always pictured us being one of those old couples that died within hours of each other…because one couldn’t live without the other.  🙂

As I stood at Greg’s gravesite yesterday, remembering the hardest, most heart-breaking day of my life, the Lord gently reminded me that even though it was the WORST day of MY life….it was the BEST day of GREG’S life.  It was the day that all the other days of his life were leading up to.  It was the climax of his 49 years on earth.  He had reached the end of the race that had been marked out for him.  And he ran that race well and he finished victoriously.  And he received the prize…the very Presence of Jesus!  Because Greg had put his faith in Jesus as his Lord and Savior, death did not win that day!  Greg was the victor, through Jesus!  And for this, I rejoice. I rejoice…but through tears of grief.

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My life has changed tremendously in the last two years.  This is not the story that I would have written for my life, but then again…I am not the author of my story.  But, I personally know the Author and I know that the story He writes can be trusted.  His plan, although not alway understood, can be trusted.

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We do not grieve like those who have no hope. Our hope is in Christ. Our hope is secure.  Two years without you, two years closer to seeing you again.  We love you Greg!

Trusting His Plan,                                                                                                                                                           Sandra

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9 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Bethany Johnson
    Oct 21, 2015 @ 09:58:20

    Beautiful.

    I love you and count it a blessing to be your friend.

    Bethany Johnson Sent from my iPhone

    >

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  2. Linda Sewell
    Oct 21, 2015 @ 10:15:20

    Thank you for those words, Sandra, and for the sweet memories video yesterday. You put such a God light on your journey and your grieving. Love you and praying for you. Linda

    Sent from my iPhone

    >

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  3. kkgreenhouse
    Oct 21, 2015 @ 10:23:02

    Wow…that’s a hard one. We are still so sorry for your loss and we continue to pray for you and your kids. Thankful Greg is with Jesus.

    Sent from my Verizon Wireless 4G LTE smartphone

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  4. Gina
    Oct 21, 2015 @ 11:11:31

    I love you Sandra.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  5. kddmyers
    Oct 21, 2015 @ 16:28:00

    I’m so sorry for your pain. We pray almost every night for comfort for your family.
    I am grateful for your willingness to share your life with us. I love you, Sandra.

    Like

    Reply

  6. Tracie
    Oct 21, 2015 @ 19:34:38

    I have been praying for you and the kids for the last two days, Sandra, and my heart aches with you. I am praying that the Lord will strengthen you in unexpected ways as you re-live precious moments. Thank you for your vulnerability – as difficult as it is to process and share, you have been an encouragement to me.

    Like

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  7. Tracy
    Oct 21, 2015 @ 19:53:48

    Love you and praying.❤️
    You and Greg continue to bless so many. Thank you for sharing your heart and life and Gods goodness in it all.

    Like

    Reply

  8. Cathy Goddard
    Oct 23, 2015 @ 08:34:45

    You and your family are beautiful. I continue to pray as I lift you up to our Heavenly Father. Love y’all.

    Like

    Reply

  9. Ike Copper
    Oct 26, 2015 @ 14:52:06

    Sandra, I, like so many others wish so much that we could take away the hurt, sadness, loneliness in your heart and replace it with nothing but happiness but unfortunately we are not able to. Knowing and believing that one day we will again be reunited with our loved ones does put such peace in our hearts though.The life that you and Greg led and that you lead now is such an inspiration to so many people. Just seeing your family pictures reflects the example you both set for Katie, Emile and Jacob. I appreciate you posting them. There’s no doubt that the Lord did indeed say those words to Greg; Well done, good and faithful servant and without a doubt you will hear those same words said to you.
    Just know that you are in so many peoples thoughts and prayers constantly.

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